A Busy Day With A Productive Lunch Break

I’m pleased to say that I made it to work today.  I made it with five minutes to spare.  Not that I slept that well last night.  I was too worried that I wouldn’t wake up this morning.  But I did and that’s the main thing and I can have an early-ish night tonight.  It’s not too late yet.

As Scott did remind me last week – Graham was on to prepare the Bible devotions for before prayer time this week.  But strangely enough, Graham forgot.  We were all a little confused and figured the roster was wrong because Graham has a phenomenal memory.  Forget megabytes, gigabytes, terabytes, nanobytes and so forth when you get to this Graham’s level you’re talking elephant-bytes.

Anyway – showing the sheer proportion of his memory capacity he opened up his Bible to the Lords’ Prayer and the words about prayer that Jesus spoke before it and he read the words from Matthew 6:5-15.  From here he worked with us to draw out the ‘big themes’ that Jesus taught us to focus on as we pray –

  • About approaching God in humility
  • About spending time alone in prayers
  • About recognising God’s great holiness
  • Recognising God as the Ruler of everything whose ways ought be honoured in all heaven and all the earth
  • Asking for what is needed to sustain us
  • Seeking forgiveness and forgiving
  • Preservation from temptation
  • & deliverance from Satan

there was debate about whether the last two should be listed together or separately, but in the end we decided that sometimes – scripture says we are tempted by our own sinful desires and other times deceived by Satan – therefore we separated them.  After talking about how we could do these more in prayer we spent time praying about praying before turning again to pray for each other and our colleagues.

We also decided that from next week we would start a series of studies on the slab of the Bible that Graham started us off with.  He has a good book that we can use, so we agreed and he’s volunteered to take the studies with us if anyone wants help preparing.  Sounds good.

Gina was weird today.  Kind of preoccupied.  And really fidgety this afternoon.  I was having enough concentrating because I was so tired without her fussing all over the place all afternoon.  I spent most of the afternoon in prayer that I wouldn’t lose my patience.  I finished up being really glad when it was time to go.

“So I’ll see you at about 5.30, 6ish?” I asked her.  Gina usually comes for her Cello lesson straight from work and we start at about 6 then she stays for dinner afterwards these days.

“Huh?”

“Are you planning to come for your lesson as usual?”

“Oh! It’s Monday! I forgot.” And she looks like she has.  Gina really has been distracted today.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah.  Yeah, I’m fine.  I’ve just had a few things on my mind the last few days.  I won’t be there til about 6.30 is that okay?  I’ve got to go home and get the Cello.”

“Sure.”

So it was never going to be an early night tonight.

As it turned out in some ways I wish Gina hadn’t bothered coming to her lesson.  Her mind was obviously somewhere else.  She was everywhere but where she was supposed to be tonight.  She spent dinner apologising – so it wasn’t much of a chat time – especially given that I was too tired to contribute much to the conversation.  Or to leave my filter on.

I told her that I was thinking about getting my hair ‘done’ sometime soon in a silent patch to relieve the sound of the buzzing fly in the next room.  She’s been hinting at me doing it for a while now so she bit.  I’m not going to hear the end of this now until its done.  Good thing I really am planning to do it… perhaps …

I am so tired.  Please, Lord, let me sleep.  And let me wake and get to work tomorrow.

Amen

Sound Patterns

Dear God,

What a passage to read on this day when I come before you burdened with my nephew’s situation, not knowing what would be best to pray for him.

In verse 13 of Chapter 1 Paul says to Timothy that he should keep the gospel that he heard from him as the pattern of sound teaching with faith and love in Christ Jesus and to guard the good deposit that was entrusted to him with the help of the Holy Spirit.

Father, these are good things to pray for any believer.  May you keep Hamish soundly patterned after the gospel he first heard and believed with faith and love in Christ Jesus.  Please, by your Holy Spirit guard the faith, the salvation that was given to him.  May he stand firm and faithful in your ways.  Father, where others are ashamed to call you their Lord when they are opposed – I thank you that Hamish has been faithful and ask that you will continue to hold him steadily in the face of  Joel’s hostility toward you.  May Joel come to know you also.

Lord, I ask that I will never be ashamed of my faith in you.  May I always be willing to say that I am yours.

Father, please help my family as we start to ask ourselves and each other over the weeks and months ahead where we stand with you because of the boldness that Hamish has shown and Joel’s response to his faith.

May each one turn to you and be saved,

In Jesus name I ask these things

Amen.

Above Shame

Dear God,

Thank you for your gospel.  Your message of good news.  The message of the grace that was given us in Jesus our saviour who has destroyed death and brought life and immortality to light.  Father may I never be ashamed of your gospel about Jesus or about Paul or any others who have been taken captive and held prisoner because they have proclaimed it.

Lord, thank you for the reminder today that your Spirit doesn’t make us timid.  Thank you for the reminder that your Spirit gives power, love, and self-discipline.  May your Spirit keep me from any sense of shame as I speak with Joel no matter how he belittles your word, your followers and how he accuses your people of lies.

Father I pray for Hamish this morning.  May his faith remain anchored firmly in you.  May your Spirit be at work in him making him bold and not timid, that he will persevere and not be ashamed of your gospel.  Strengthen him with the power,  love and self-discipline that comes from you.  Lord, the burden of a ten-year old’s love for his father’s disapproval of his faith is a heavy load to carry.  Please soften Joel’s heart toward you.  For his own sake as well as Hamish’s.

Father, if Hamish is to suffer even in a small way for his faith, may you convict him of the reason for which he holds firmly to your truth.  Help him to remember that he has no cause for shame, regardless of what his father might imply about his beliefs.

Thank you Lord that I am free to follow you without opposition.  May I never take that for granted or act as though my faith were an embarrassment.

May I bring you honour all of my days.

Amen.

Haunting Music

Dear God,

Thank you for a couple of days free from strange and unexpected occurrences.

I expected nothing less that to hear Gina theatricise (is that a word?) about her efforts with the computer today after yesterday’s lesson …

“…and the fingers on my right hand throbbed every time one of them hit the keyboard.  I wanted to spend the day writing things like ‘kill, kill, kill’ & ‘my polo pony’ because they only need you to use your right hand for a while …” grand sweeping gestures of the right hand working the keyboard … “but then – oh my right arm! The muscles just ached! Holding that bow just so …” again she demonstrates, “and manoeuvring it to play … Oh my ..” she stops short and looks at me, “… garden gnomes!”

And that finished me.  I laughed.

“Fine friend and teacher you are. Oh, yes – here’s the picture of sympathy!”

I keep laughing.

” You’ll live.”

But that only takes me back to yesterday ….

For the most part work was unremarkable – but then there’s always Scott.

When they were handing out patience I think Scott thought they were playing cards and decided to pass.  Seriously.  After Bible study (okay, so that was actually remarkable … but it doesn’t fit in the work box properly and I was too nervous to concentrate well) in Graham’s office Scott’s all,

“So what have you got planned for Gina for tonight?”

“A Cello lesson and dinner.”

“Yes, but, come on, an ideal situation for witnessing…”

“Scott, everyday is witnessing.  We witness by being godly and speaking when it is opportune.  But if I’m reading James correctly, if I’m not living righteously then I’m wasting my breath.”

“What’s so wrong about hitting her with the gospel while you’ve got her at your home.”

“She’s coming for a Cello lesson.  She’s invited to dinner, not an evangelistic programme.  She’s not coming for an altar call, Scott.  It’s dishonest to trick someone into a situation they don’t want – do you think it will make her open to listen?  Do you think it reflects how God wants us to come to him?  I’m not going that road.  I’m going to pray for opportunities and openings and boldness – but deception is not an option.  I’m not railroading her, Scott.  She has already said that she doesn’t want to discuss it any further than we have.”

Scott nodded and walked away looking slightly perplexed.

But it’s true.  I mean, I know that James 2 is talking about showing generosity and acting on faith in sacrifice – but its also about demonstrating by what you do that you trust God to be God and be prepared to act accordingly.

So – I will prepare myself to act, to invite, to talk, to comfort, to do whatever is needed to make her way back and be ready to make the most of opportunities, and I will continue to pray.  But I will go about doing as I have promised Gina that I would, and with God’s help I will act in a way that is godly in all I do as his witness that he is trustworthy even though she does not believe that at the moment.  To show that he is real even in the way he opens the way for the sharing of the gospel.

Gina’s lesson went well.  Her aunt’s cello is a beautiful instrument.  I can’t wait until she can play it well.  And she will – if she keeps it up, of course.  Very basic stuff today, but Gina picked up some quickly.  Apparently her Aunt was going to teach her when she was younger, but something interrupted before they got into it.  Still, she was complaining of sore fingers and having trouble holding arm in position to use the bow properly by the end.  She has a nice feel for the instrument and a good ear.  I hope she keeps it up, even if she decides to go to a different teacher after a while.

Dinner was great – as usual.  I hate cooking for just me – so I tend to pull out all stops for a visitor and enjoy myself.  There so much that’s more practical to cook for two or three than for one – even using leftovers.

Gina asked me over dinner what I’d been reading lately.  It was actually a novel that I had found among her books called  Bamboo and Lace.  Reading it now it surprised me that she’d been into that genre of book – I’d have picked her as more of a mystery lover than this book.  But then I’ve only ever met the dark, bruised Gina – not the idealist.  When I told her about the book she smiled at some memory, then let it go following it out through the window with her eyes with a distant expression on her face.

“I used to love that book.  Back when I was thinking of mission and so dedicated to Christ.  I always found the way that she was ready to give up so much of what she wanted – of what the world tells you is important – to do what she was convinced was the only righteous way to respond to her situation so inspiring.  I always hoped that I’d be able to do that if pushed.” She re-entered the room, her voice hardening, “Now look at me,” she added with a brief attempt to laugh at herself.

“Do you ever wish things were different?” I asked

She shrugs here.

“Sometimes.  I haven’t for ages.” she paused. “You can make it look real again sometimes.”

Silence.  I let her look at her own ghosts.  I’m not unsettled.  Now is a time she needs to listen to the Spirit moving moving in her – not to me.

“What?  No words of wisdom?”

“You already know anything I could say,” I grin at her. “You just want an argument so that you can talk yourself out of your thoughts.”

“You’re good.”  She smiles back at me.

“No.  God is good.  But you know that, too.  Coffee?”

Lord, please keep Gina second guessing herself.  Help her to keep questioning you again.  Father, occupy her thoughts – day and night – with your word, your truth, your gospel, your mercy, your hope.  Please bring her back to your fold.

Help me to be wise in how I act and speak, that my deeds will speak of my faith so that you may use me as your mouthpiece be it directly or indirectly.  May I bring honour to my Lord and my God in whom I pray,

Amen

You’ve Got Me Beat

Dear God,

Thanks for a week without a lot of incidents.  I’m still pretty exhausted and recovering from last week, I think.  I mean, there was Wednesday – but who could complain about Wednesday?  That kind of exhaustion is elating.  Imagine – Paul’s answer to Emily’s wanting to understand more about God was for all of them to go to Church and Sunday School.  I don’t know why I should be surprised that you can work without me, Father.  I guess I just start feeling like I have to take on everything myself.  And I’m so used to Joel.  That is the most taxing thing at the moment.  This whole situation with Joel and Hamish.  Father, only you can resolve this one.  Please do.  I worry so much about Hamish, Joel can be frightening when he never intends to be – when he’s frightened … which is what he is when it comes to you, Lord.  Please soften Joel’s heart Father.

Hamish was so stoic today when he came for his lessons.  Cracking jokes, showing off – full of beans.  Like he’d forced himself to swallow every one of them that he could bring himself to before he came – for my sake.  Lot’s of fun – don’t get me wrong – he had me in stitches to the point where I couldn’t remember what we were supposed to be doing.  But it was like he was trying to prove to me that he was alright.  And he’s not.  He gave me an extra long hug at the end when Karen came to get him.

Karen smiled an unspoken acknowledgement of my brother’s stubbornness at me.

I nodded and smiled an ‘I don’t know how you put up with it’ back to her.

To which she shrugged and half smiled an ‘I love the man …’

All without speaking while Hamish had his head tucked over my shoulder.

Emily on the other hand was pumped.  She was genuinely excited and full of questions about Church and Sunday school and what happened and people who would be there and – you name it … down to how many cubicles were in the toilets, what kinds of flowers and ‘did the minister wear a dress?’ because someone at school told her that ministers wore dresses …  She could barely focus on her drumming either and stopped to ask a new question every time she started anything.

What sheep station?

Maybe I was wrong after all.

Who needs to compete for sheep stations – or whatever it’s ten-year-old’s equivalent is when you have Church to look forward to or long for?  A desire to worship him unhindered.  A curiosity driven by the Spirit that seems insatiable that drives as many spiritual questions as a child’s enquiring mind drives ones that seem random … or “why?”…

I have to ask myself, ‘where did that go in me?’ at times; and ‘what did it become?’

Father help me take the time – no matter how long I live here on earth to know you to stop and be astounded by your wonderful glory, your authority, your creativity, your love, your holiness and your majesty.  And you grace Lord.  Always by your grace.

Father help me to prepare for Gina’s cello lesson on Monday too.  I’m kind of nervous about that.  Prepare her also.  It’s going to be weird to teach an adult after all this time.  Thanks for this chance to spend good time with her.

Amen

See today Hamish Johns’ Secret Diary for an update on his journey.